Sora: Hehe, Seamus is gay!
Seamus: *goes insane* I'M NOT GAY I'M NOT GAY I'M NOT GAAAAAAY!!!!!! ...... (points to Goki) HE'S GAY!!
Goki: Eh?
Gabriel: ....I knew it. You're in love with Torrgason.
Meli: *mildly* You are, too.

(Gabriel admits it without hesitation.)

Gabriel: Yes.
Elma: .... o.O ......

(Ryuutou enters, his interest piqued [even from very far away] by a discussion of homosexuality. His hair is long and white, braided, but black at the tips. He wears a white kimono with the design of a dragon serpent winding around his body and arms. In his hands, he carries two fans, which proudly display the rising sun. Cute, stubby horns adorn his head.)

Ryuutou: Hello, now... what's this?

(Taisa takes one look at Ryuutou before transforming into the lovely magical girl, "Retainer" — the legendary guardian of the Demon God Dungeon.)

Taisa: WHO GOES THERE?!?! (brandishes a sword and shield) STATE YOUR BUSINESS AT THIS SACRED SITE, BARBARIAN INTRUDER!!!!
Ryuutou: Eeeee... I just got here from Sora's homepage!
Taisa: Whoa. You came all the way here from the Nexus of the Data Moon?  o_o

(NOTE: http://datamoon.net/nexus/ )

Ryuutou: Yup yup! Sure did! *fang-grin*

(Taisa tugs on Sora's sleeve to get her attention.)

Taisa: *whispers* Who he?
Sora: *whispers back* That's my original character, Ryuutou. He's one of two young demon brothers. He's also gay.
Taisa: Oooooh...

Seamus: I heard that! I heard the "ALSO"!! You better mean "ALSO" as in "IN ADDITION TO GABRIEL"!!!

Gabriel: Did someone say "demon"? ......... Cha-ching!! Sample!

(Gabe hastily whips out a syringe of flasken and then approaches Ryuutou as casually as possible, trying not to look threatening. Ryuutou assumes SD mode and immediately hides behind Sora.)

Ryuutou: I'm scared of needles!
Gabriel: ..... Come out.... I  won't hurt you, child... *warm smile* ... What is your name...?
Elma: There's something awfully familiar about this...
Ryuutou: (stares intently at Gabriel)
Sora: He's, um, lying, Ryuutou. -_-
Ryuutou: .... I know, but... he's really... sort of cute....

(Ryuutou whips a camera out from the sleeve of his kimono and takes several pictures of Gabriel.)

Ryuutou: Hehehehehehe!

(He runs around and around Gabriel, taking pictures of his face and his butt and his crotch and his hair and his back, etc... Until Gabriel gets really dizzy from trying to keep up with watching Ryuutou — around and around and around, *flash*flash*flash*.)

(Hikaru enters at this point, having followed his brother from the Nexus. His young demon hair is blue and his young demon kimono is decorated with swimming fishies.)

Hikaru: (sees Ryuutou) ...... Oh, geez...

(Taisa is too involved in the whole gay-demon-taking-pictures-of-Gabriel's-crotch thing to transform into Retainer and demand that Hikaru state his business. In fact, no one pays much attention to him. Feeling somewhat unloved, Hikaru turns to his most belovéd food... a lollypop!)

Gabriel: *dizzy* Uuuunngh...

(Ryuutou hurriedly grabs up all his polaroids and runs to the 24-hour Kinko's across the street from the Dungeon, and Gabriel is too dizzy to pursue.)

Sora: Hum... It would seem Ryuutou is now infatuated with Gabriel....
Hikaru: Ryuutou, please do think with your head and not your penis!!!!
Ryuutou: You said "penis"!!! HAHAHHAA!!

(Everyone watches Ryuutou photocopy pictures of Gabriel and put them on his wall.)

Elma: Oh, dear.... Gabriel.... has an.... admirer??
Sora: It would seem.... so... That's a first, eh?
Taisa: This is so wrong on so many levels.
Sora: The one-person fanboy club!
Elma: Won't Gabe be over-joyed....

(Ryuutou pauses in plastering his bedroom wall so that he can stare lovingly at Gabriel.)

Gabriel: ....................................... (observes the filthy 'Sample,' disgusted by its sycophantic behavior)

(Seamus gets one look at Gabriel, and knows the psychopath is suffering.)

Seamus: Heh heh heh... I have the power to compound his pain...!!

(Hungering for revenge against Gabriel for sooooo many offenses, Seamus whips out his lap-top, hacks into SPIN-Serv, and prints up every file he can find. He hands them all to Ryuutou.)

Seamus: Everything you ever wanted to know about Gabriel is in these files, Ryuu-kun, dear buddy! I'll let you have them on just one condition.
Ryuutou: Oooooh, anything!
Seamus: Promise me you'll be Gabriel's number one fan forever!!!
Gabriel: ..................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Ryuutou happily agrees, accepts the files, and reads them all at a demonic speed. When he's done...)

Ryuutou: *eyes glaze over*

(Elma stares at Ryuutou and waves a hand in front of his face.)

Taisa: (*tug*tug* on Sora's sleeve) *whispers* What's he doin' now...?
Sora: Oh, he must be having a fantasy about Gabe...

Ryuutou: Oh, I am... Ooooooh......
Elma: Fantasy...?
Taisa: As in... kinky stuff...?
Elma + Taisa: *chant* WE WANNA HEAR! WE WANNA HEAR! WE WANNA HEAR!
 

 *~ Commence Ryuutou's fantasy sequence: ~*
 

Ryuutou: Okay, so I'm laying in bed, and Hikaru starts yelling bloody murder next to me, cause he sleeps next to me on the floor........ And he suddenly runs out of the room, and laying in his place, Gabe is there, sitting all silent with his eyes closed.... and he's naked... (pauses and blushes) ..... And he opens his eyes, and he looks at me and says in his sultry voice, "I want you, Ryuutou. I want you so badly...."

Elma: Oooooooooooh ~~~
Gabriel: *twitch* .... *twitch* ....

Ryuutou: **starting to go all dreamy** And then he starts kissing my neck, and then I kiss him, and, and.... (puts face in hands and flushes crimson, giggling madly)

Hikaru: You see what I have to put up with....?!

Ryuutou: ... And he pushes me onto the mattress. He's rough, but he doesn't hurt me .... *squeals* This is so embarrassing!!!

Gabriel: (goes into compulsive twitching state)
Sora: (patting Gabriel on the back) You got a really hard-core fanboy there, Gabe!
Taisa: ...... Sora said... "hard"...
Elma: EEEEH! *squeals*
Gabriel: (begins to foam at the mouth)

Ryuutou: And he brings his body all close and I can hear his heart beat and feel the warmth from his body...

Hikaru: His fantasies have officially gone further than the ones with Jidai. Congrats, Gabriel....
Gabriel: .... *TWITCH!* .... *TWITCH!*TWITCH!*TWITCH!*TWITCH!*

Ryuutou: Gabe-kun says he must take a sample..... and he kinda.... um.... (plays with hands)

(... There follows an anxious silence...)

Elma: ........ *very seriously* Yeeeeesh?
Hikaru: (sucking on his lollypop) I think I know what's coming next....
Elma: Ya do?
Seamus: "What's coming next"? *perverse giggle*
Hikaru: Oh, yes....

(Hikaru winks and sucks with a fierce viciousness on his lollypop.)

Elma: ......... Is that supposed to be a hint....?
Hikaru: *just smiles*  Maybe....
Elma: ........ O.O !!!
Taisa: ... Don't play dumb, Elma! We all know about that "Unforgotten Deed" lemon that was conveniently lost!
Elma: (looks around innocently) Who, me?  ^O^

Ryuutou: Hi-Hikaru!!! **blushes**

Elma: NAUGHTY!! NAUGHTY RYUU-CHAN!!! Oh, Gabe, aren't you proud? You've become an object of desire!!!

(Silence.)

Elma: Gabe? ..... Gabe?

(Elma looks and sees Gabriel lying face-first on the ground.)

Elma: ..... Hm.
Sora: Oh dear, he looks rather dead....
Elma: .... (pokes Gabe) I think you're right...

Ryuutou: *crying and screaming* OH MY GOOODDSS!!! I KILLED GABE-KUN!!! I KILLED HIM!!! WAAAAAAAA~!!!

Seamus: This is all too good to be true, somehow.
Taisa: I know... I write the bastard, and even *I* can't kill him!
Elma: I have an idea for how to wake him back up!
Taisa: Do we have to? I don't like him.
Elma: Of course we have to! The story's not over!
Taisa: Oh. ...... Oh, yah! Huh!

(Elma whispers her plan into Taisa's ear.)

Taisa: Hey... I kinda like that! It's completely humiliating!
Elma: Isn't it?!?!??!  >:D
Seamus: OOOH! YOU'RE GONNA BRING GABE BACK TO LIFE JUST TO HUMILIATE HIM?!??! Can I help??

Ryuutou: (heard Seamus) YOU CAN BRING HIM BACK??!? TELL ME HOW TO BRING HIM BACK!!!

Elma + Taisa: *evil grins* ... Okay...

(Elma and Maintainer pull Ryuutou aside. Seamus insists on being part of the humiliation, so he comes along. Sora and Meli choose to stay behind so they can poke Gabe's lifeless carcass with sticks.)

(When Ryuutou comes back out... HE'S DRESSED AS GAVIN!! His hair has been dyed light brown, he's wearing glasses, gots a ciggie in his mouth, and he receives prompts from the giggling Elma, Taisa, and Seamus through his Gavin-esque ear piece.)

Seamus: (via ear piece) Remember everything you've read, Ryuutou...
Elma: (via ear piece) No, no, he's not Ryuutou. He's Gavin now.
Taisa: (via ear piece) Right — be in character, Gavin! You ARE Gavin!
Seamus: (via ear piece) Okay, Gav... this is what you do: Walk up to Gabriel like you're someone who's real sober, very formal, and a stick in the mud — just like Gav!

(Ryuutou complies.)

Seamus: (via ear piece) Now, repeat after me...

Ryuutou as Gavin: What are you doing laying there, Mr. Owings? We have a mission to accomplish!
Gabriel: (SITS UP!!!)
Sora: *gasp!*
Gavin: ..... *TWITCH!!* .... *TWITCH!* .....
Meli: Eep! Hey, there's two Gavins!
Sora: EEEEEEeeeeeEEEeEeeEEeeEeEEEee~

(Sora knocks the suspicious one unconscious. Meli then receives ear pieces from the person who appears everytime she wants something, and she and Sora hop onto the air waves.)

Gavin: (unconscious, but still continues to twitch)

Seamus: GAAAV! (dives in, abandoning his post)

Gabriel: I'm sorry, Torrgason. Must have dozed off.... *staaare* ..... Now.... what about the mission?
Ryuutou as Gavin: (takes a puff of the cig) Come on, Mr. Owings.... *looks up dramatically*  ... We must go... Time is precious.

(Ryuutou stands up, and Gabriel follows suit.)

Gabriel: You're right. Where are we headed?
Ryuutou: ............ (listens into earpiece for line)

Elma: (via ear piece) Er... say... erm... Sora, what should he say?
Sora: (via ear piece) Uh... I dunno.... Taisa?
Taisa: (via ear piece) Wha—? Don't ask me. Meli?
Meli: (via ear piece) Rou has nice hair... *smile* .... He should be in the braid trade.
Seamus: (via ear piece, far away from everyone but the real Gavin) You guys can't do anything without me, can you?!
Elma: (via ear piece) Oh, I have it, say, "We should probably go back to the base and await order."

Ryuutou as Gavin: We should probably go back to the base and await order....

Elma: (via ear piece) ... Oops, I mean, "orders"! o.O

Ryuutou as Gavin: That is, orders....

Taisa: (via ear piece) *sings* Elma has horrible grammar~ Elma has horrible grammar~ I should know 'cause I edit her stuff~
Sora: (via ear piece) That's because you're grammar obsessive-compulsive, Tai-chan.
Elma: (via ear piece) SHH, TAISA!! NOBODY HAS TO KNOW ABOUT MY GRAMMAR!!!
Sora: (via ear piece) I'm pretty sure /everybody/ knows, Eru-chan.
Meli: (via ear piece) Did you know, Ryuutou?
Seamus: (via ear piece) Ask Gabriel if he knew, Ryuu-kun!

Ryuutou as Gavin: .......... (is positive that he does not want Gabriel's opinion of Elma's grammar, and so he tries to make up his own lines) ... Come, Gabriel, to the base, just us.... two, alone....

Seamus: *sings* Elma can't spell~ Elma was in ESL classes~
Elma: SHUDAP! SHUDAP SHUDAP SHUDAP!!!
Taisa: Nah! The boy can carry a tune! KEEP GOIN', SEAMUS!!
Elma: ............ Somebody's gonna get hurt in the next chapter I write. /Just/ for this.
Seamus: OOOOoooooOOOOOooOOOOOOOooooooOOooo~ I'm soooooo scaaaaaaared! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Meli: Um... Seamus, you didn't see what she did to Inu Yasha.... I don't think you appreciate how scary she can be...

Ryuutou as Gavin: I mean — not Gabriel — rather, Mr. Owings....
Gabriel: ..... You can call me Gabriel if it pleases you to do so.

Elma + Sora + Taisa: Oooooh!
Meli + Seamus: Eeeeee...
Gavin: ........... (still unconscious)

Ryuutou as Gavin: (smiles and taps his cigarette) Alright, Gabriel.... (as he starts walking, hisses into his ear piece:) Is there any faster way to get to the base? I don't even know where it is!!

Elma: (via ear piece) ..... Erm.... You can..... take a heli?
Seamus: (via ear piece) Ask for a heli.
Sora + Meli + Taisa: (via ear piece) How posh!

Ryuutou: (via ear piece) Ask Gabriel?

Seamus: (via ear piece) Yah. We’z NOEL folk can get /anything/ in seconds. *shit eating grin*

Ryuutou as Gavin: Gabriel, I think it would be best if we take a heli...
Gabriel: .... You know what? You're right...

(Gabriel whips out his cell phone, orders a heli, and a heli shows up in 2.4 seconds.)

Gabriel: ... Shall we, Mr. Torrgason?
Ryuutou as Gavin: Yes, Gabriel... You can call me Gavin....

Elma: YOU GO, RYUU-CHAN! You're on first name basis now!!
Taisa: Smooth. Very smooth.
Sora: Slicker than snot!
Meli: ... Ew, Sora.
Seamus: I think I'll go throw up now.

Ryuutou: (climbs into the helicopter)
Gabriel: As you wish... Gavin. (climbs in, too)

(... And that's where they stayed.... for the rest of the night.... And they are probably still in that heli right now....)

Hikaru: (watching heli, high in the sky) Oh, them windows damn fogged up... *squints* Oh, yeah. I hope Ryuutou doesn't wanna talk about this later....

Elma: Gabriel's gonna be acting weird next chapter.... o.O;;
Taisa: Is Gabriel still gonna be able to *walk* in the next chapter?!
Sora: We have so warped the world of A.X.N....
Meli: Do you have any more lollypops, Hikaru?

(Everyone watches as the Heli shakes left and right, swings into the tree, then jerks into the sky...)

Seamus: Muahahahahaha... And in the end, Gabriel got his 'Sample.' I LOVE happy endings!